Monthly archives: November, 2006

Meaningless Awards of the Week- 11/15/06

Welcome to the latest recurring feature on Legion of Doom that I’ll inevitable give up on after a couple of weeks: the Meaningless Awards of the Week! Maybe I’ll actually stick this one since I can do however many or few I want depending on the quality of books that week. This week, I’m handing out six Meanies. Next week, it might only be one. Anyone care to place take the over/under on how long I’ll keep this up?

What If Spider-Man The OtherBest Line of the Week- Uatu the Watcher from What If..? Spider-Man The Other, by Peter David

“It is said in storytelling that it is preferable to show rather than tell. But to show the slow, gradual destruction of the being known as Peter Parker…it would be too heartbreaking. I speak of these “What Ifs… to educate–to bring you understanding of the many directions that choices can take you. Not to send you into spirals of depression. Nor depict things so nightmarish that you will never have another full night’s sleep, ever, if you bear witness to them. So take the word of Uatu, the Watcher, that it was a long and terrible battle. And ultimately…one that Peter Parker lost.”

Worst Justification of the Superhero Registration Act of the Week- Civil War #5

So now apparently the US government wanted to ban all superheroes from the beginning, and Iron Man and Mr. Fantastic were just coming up with a compromise so superheroes could still stick around: Forced military service vs. imprisonment. Nice. I think we tried that a while ago, but it didn’t turn out too well that time either. Oh, and did Iron Man actually try to justify killing Bill Foster by saying Thor did what any police officer would have done? Last time I checked, cops didn’t shoot people through the chest with lightning. That may be the definition of excessive force.

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This week’s meager haul, Civil War ramblings

Three stinking books this week. That’s it. Of course, this means my wallet is a little heavier (although it’s not, since we’ve evolved to a cash-less society. How can the future be dystopian if commerce is such a breeze? Orwell, you’re full of shit!) so I shouldn’t complain.

I can’t reveal my thoughts on Astro City #1 yet. You’ll have to come back Saturday to partake in our Books of Doom discussion for that. Pretty please.

Aside from that, I picked up Astonishing X-Men #18 and Tales of the Unexpected #2. And I only picked up TOTU because I felt like a prick only buying two books. And, if you want a good evaluation of the book, I’d say it’s the kind of thing one should only buy if you’re really desperate to not look like a prick. David Lapham writes these adventures of the Spectre and Crispus Allen, and it’s okay but abundantly cheesy and dark for the sake of darkness. Maybe this works for the four diehard Crispus Allen fans, but it doesn’t for me. And the back-up story, which I’ve already forgotten the title of, was just piss-poor. Some annoying guy and some vampire are in a cave and have a stupid conversation about pointless crap. The end.

As for Astonishing, I hate to say this, but Joss Whedon has done such a fantastic job with this series so far, and of course my expectations are sky high, but this was not a very good issue, at least on the first read. The explanation of multiple Emmas and non-existent Hellfire Clubs and Cassandra Nova (whom I never read much of) just seemed like a big pile of mashed potatoes smeared on the page. Everything else was fun, but there wasn’t a whole lot else.

The sequence with Beast and the ball of yarn was great, but then Whedon wrote him as too bookish when he comes back. Beast was always polished, but he wasn’t a Victorian aristocrat. In other words, for the first time, it seemed Whedon didn’t quite nail a character, which is all the more jarring for how perfectly he’s gotten everyone before.

Then again, maybe I’m just feeling a huge bum-out coming when they kill off Colossus again. Like when Hawkeye bit the Bendis bullet, I have a feeling another of my favorite characters is heading for the Land Where Heroes Are Forgotten Until They’re Remembered and Brought Back For Some Nonsensical Reason.

Now, while I’m good and warmed up, have I ever got a lot to say about Civil War #5!!!

I didn’t buy it.

Wow, a perfect review in four words (rounding one contraction down). What’s the point? Well, I’m pretty sick of this online fanboy blogger community jumping all over themselves to crap in the cereal of various books or writers they love to hate (or vice versa). You know what, if you don’t like something, DON’T BUY IT!

Do you really think mega publishers are reading this crap and deciding what gi-normous event to plan next? Not a darn chance. We wee readers have little truck with the giants of the comics world. But, we do have our dollars. And while MY dollars may not mean the world to mega publisher, the average sales, etc., etc., do mean an awful lot to them. So instead of everyone buying the big pile of crap served up to us only to rip it online, we could just give it a “No thank you, ma’am,” and maybe the next time they’ll serve up something better.



I swear this is my last post about Heroes

Sales' HeroesWe’ve discussed Heroes quite a bit here on Legion of Doom. Doom DeLuise and his brother hate it. I really like it. Jean-Claude Van Doom also seems to enjoy it a lot. I know Colonel Doom watches it, but I don’t think he has a strong opinion either way. And I’m pretty sure Jim Doom stopped watching after the first episode.

What I want to say about the show isn’t about how good it is or how bad it is. It’s about a cool little bit of info I just found out, and might bring a little more appreciation to the show from comics fans.

You see that picture up at the top? It’s one of Isaac Mendez’s paintings from the show. That particular one I don’t remember seeing on the show, but it struck me as the coolest of the bunch. Looks pretty good, right?

You know why? Because Tim Sale did it. He did them all. The very same Tim Sale we all enjoyed in Superman Confidential #1 and the very same Time Sale that did Daredevil: Yellow. Not only that, but Dave Stewart, the guy that did the colors, was the colorist on DC: The New Frontier.

Pretty cool, huh?



Week Twenty-Eight

Aside from an incredibly decent cover and a neat splash page featuring Batwoman laying the smacketh down on some Intergang thugs, this week’s issue is surprisingly dull. For the sake of ritual, though, let’s address what actually happens this week, and I’ll tell you why it sucks so much.52 week 28

First off, we find Renee Montoya and the Question back in Gotham (that was abrupt!), and they’re trying to warn the Batwoman that she’s been prophesied to be killed by Intergang in the old Book of Crime. Uh-oh, Spaghetti-O’s! The Batwoman eventually takes the fight to Intergang and Manheim, who beats her up, talks about the prophecy, and is interrupted by the Question and Montoya (who he refers to as “The Questions”). He tosses Batwoman aside and runs ass over tea-kettle out of there.

Meanwhile, some Australian stereotypes get into an argument in the Outback, only to be attacked by the newly salvaged Red Tornado, who has a stupid looking body (remember, he was almost finished, like, two months ago). He beats up a guy and then gets beat down by a bunch of angried up Aussies. They toss his scraps into the back of a truck, which sports a logo of who owns the junk–Ridge Ferrick. You’ll remember that the bidness with the Question/Montoya/Batwoman/Intergang all started in a Ridge Ferrick warehouse in Gotham, way back in week seven or so. That reminds me, whatever happened to the editor notes? Marvel still uses those.

After that, we’re taken back to the storyline with Animal Man/Adam Strange/Starfire/Lobo/the Emerald Ekron thing for some good old fashioned SPACE BOREDOM. Turns out the Ekron nonsense is a Green Lantern, and it was forced to watch its entire system turned to dust, since it can’t use its power without the Emerald Eye. Whoops. Now, our space adventurers (see: boring idiots who can’t find their way home) are the only people standing between the Stygian Passover (see: unknown, all-powerful space force of mystery and doom) and Earth.

The stuff in Gotham works for me, as does the stuff in the Outback, but that nonsense in space really tanks every issue for me that it’s in. I’ve no reason to care about it yet, and that’s saying something, since it’s been given so much time to develop. Lobo’s not funny, the trio of marooned adventurers are one-dimensional, and the threat they’re facing is too silly to care about. Not to mention that the way the whole sequence is written in this issue is so darn confusing that you can’t tell what’s going on until the last two pages where they sum up what just happened on the previous eight. Should’ve hit the snooze button this week.

See ya in seven.



Book of Doom: Astro City #1

It’s Wednesday, and we all know what that means. So, while you’re at your local comic shop, picking up the latest and greatest today, do yourself a favor and pick up “Astro City: The Dark Age Book 2 #1,” the first issue in the second story-arc of this Wildstorm property. Then, come back here on Saturday, and join myself, along with the rest of the Legion of Doom, in talking about what we all thought of it. If you actually do that, it’ll be a first. Here’s the run-down:

Written by Kurt Busiek; Art by Brent Anderson ; Cover by Alex Ross

The acclaimed ASTRO CITY returns with “Eyes of a Killer,” the second story arc in the 16-issue DARK AGE epic by Kurt Busiek, Brent Anderson and Alex Ross! The mean streets of Astro City in the 1970s are getting meaner, and Charles and Royal Williams are drawn deeper into the darkness. Against the background of Astro City’s most turbulent decade, featuring the Street Angel, Black Velvet, The Apollo 11, Jack-In-the-Box and more, one brother is targeted for death — while the other makes a discovery that could change their lives forever.

Wildstorm | 32pg. | Color | $2.99 US



DC: The New Frontier Volume 2

DC New Frontier Vol 2By Darwyn Cooke (W/A) and Dave Stewart (C)

Cover Price $19.99. Published by DC Comics. Originally printed as DC: The New Frontier 4-6.

Click here for the Library of Doom entry for DC: The New Frontier Volume 1.

Plot: Against the backdrop of the 1950s, all of America’s heroes unite to challenge the greatest threat humanity has ever known.

Strengths: This is the DC Universe we all know and love. Superman, Batman & Robin, Wonder Woman, Flash, Green Lantern, Martian Manhunter, Green Arrow and Aquaman are all present and accounted for. Even Adam Strange, Dr. Fate and the Spectre make appearances. New Frontier Volume 2 includes all the superhero action you wanted to see in Volume 1 but couldn’t because the superheroes just hadn’t come into the story yet.

If it’s even possible, Darwyn Cooke’s art is better in this volume than it was in the last. There are subtle changes in character designs from the first volume, like the shape of Batman’s cowl, which let you know that these characters and the story are moving forward in time. One thing’s for certain: you’ll never look at Wonder Woman’s invisible jet the same way.

Cooke’s writing is just as important as the art. The story starts out small, with a black superhero fighting alone against oppression in the South. From that point it grows and grows until the story quite literally becomes a struggle of epic proportions. Along the way, Cooke addresses some of the biggest issues of the day, including racism and the anti-war sentiment. Strangely enough, he even tackles the idea of superhero vigilantism vs. government registration, the major aspect of Marvel’s crossover Civil War, and does so in a manner far superior to what’s happening at the House of Ideas. The strongest aspect of Cooke’s writing, however, is his ability to capture the innocence of the time. While we as readers have grown accustomed to something like a man running at the speed of sound or a giant pterodactyl showing up out of nowhere, it’s something the characters in the story can’t even begin to comprehend. That naivety shows in the writing and it rubs off on the reader, so it’s almost as if you’re experiencing everything for the first time all over again.

One of most fun aspects of the story is the way Cooke likes to throw in Easter eggs and in-jokes to keep the more well-versed readers on their toes. Names are dropped regularly, from the fairly recognizable Ray Palmer and Will Magnus to the more obscure Rex Tyler and Nathaniel Adam. When Hal Jordan charges his ring for the first time in silence, he remarks that the act seems to warrant some sort of a “pithy” catchphrase to go along with it. And you can probably guess what happens when Hal tries to call his mechanic “Pieface.”

Weaknesses: None.

Grade: A+. New Frontier Volume 2, even read independent of the first trade, is an amazing story. While it is the second half of a larger arc, it reads as a complete story in and of itself. This should be required reading for anyone that considers themselves a fan of superhero comics. With time, DC: The New Frontier will take it’s place beside Watchmen, The Dark Knight Returns and Kingdom Come as one of the all-time great superhero stories.



Daredevil: Yellow

By Jeph Loeb (W) and Tim Sale (A).

Cover Price $14.99. Published by Marvel Comics, 2001-2002. Originally printed as Daredevil: Yellow #1-6.

Plot: This story takes a look back at how Daredevil became who he is today, showing the murder of Matt Murdock’s father (done in by mobsters after he refuses to throw a fight) during the time that Matt attended law school. It also shows Murdock, along with fellow portly chum Foggy Nelson, open up his own law firm and the headaches that accompany such an endeavor. After opening the firm, the two start to look for somebody to work as their secretary, and, after a string of losers, finally come across beautiful blonde (and frequent damsel in distress) Karen Page. Both men are instantly smitten, but she seems to favor Matt and, by night, Daredevil, whose costume is yellow and red, made out of the fabric of his dad’s old prizefighting robe. As Daredevil, the hero hunts down the men responsible for Battling Jack Murdock’s death, in order to bring them to justice. The narrative is told through letters that present-day Matt is writing to the now deceased Karen Page, his first love, in order to help him cope with her death.

Strengths: Loeb and Sale nail the nostalgia in this one. It just feels like you’re reading an old classic comic book, yet it’s only five years old. Also, I can’t say enough positive things about Matt Hollingsworth’s spectacular coloring (water color!) throughout the book. It’s just beautiful to look at, and extremely fun to read. As for the writing, the greatest quote I found is spoken as words of wisdom from Matt’s dad to Matt, when he says, “The measure of a man is not in how he gets knocked down to the mat. It is in how he gets up.” It does an excellent job of showing the love and admiration Matt has for his dad, a self-proclaimed “uneducated pug.”

Weaknesses: The main weakness is that the developing love between Matt Murdock and Karen Page just isn’t there. He says he’s in love with her, but, it’s not on the page. It seems rushed, forced, and too easily developed before anything of note happens between them. The dynamic between Karen and Daredevil is much more smooth and natural.

Grade: A- While I can’t think of anything technically wrong about this book, it just doesn’t strike me as being as good as everybody has told me it is. There are lots of great moments, but it reads so quickly, that it’s hard to say it has any real emotional impact, overall. Coming from a guy that’s never read Daredevil before, though, I’d say it’s an incredibly decent place to get acquainted with the character and his supporting cast.



Book of Doom: Bullet Points

Photobucket - Video and Image HostingWelcome back to another weekend with the Doomers. This time we’re all kicking back around the fiery gates of hell and reading the first issue of Bullet Points, by J. Michael Stracynski. It’s essentially a “what if?” book, positing the scientist who turned wimpy Steve Rogers into Captain America died before administering his super serum.

I was pretty annoyed with the introduction, in which this murder is compared to the assassinations of Gandhi, JFK, MLK Jr. and Franz Ferdinand. It reminds me of Marvel naming a big summer crossover after the most terrible, gruesome event in our nation’s history. That aside, it was interesting though it took ridiculous and unnecessary liberties with the 616 universe this supposedly drifts away from.

The art was particularly good, reminiscent of Steve Epting and Michael Lark. I don’t know if that owes to Tommy Lee Edwards work or if Marvel is utilizing a pseudo-painted coloring and shading effect that makes everything look cool.

For the other Doomers… (more…)



Week Twenty-Seven

After what’s been a surprisingly long time (a couple years now since Identity Crisis), Ralph Dibny comes face to face with Jean Loring, his wife’s killer. The issue focuses almost entirely on this meeting and it’s a damn good thing they gave it such focus. Sue Dibny’s death is one of the major tragedies in DC history, a dark moment of heroic failure that set the stage for the company’s massive Infinite Crisis, which set the stage for 52.

Photobucket - Video and Image HostingIn his continued quest with the helmet of Fate to find a way to bring Jean back to life, Ralph seeks out the Spectre, who for some reason seems to not be in anyone’s body. This doesn’t make much sense, because he should be connected to Det. Crispus Allen (right?). Spectre takes Ralph to Jean, who’s still orbiting the sun, eliminating Eclipso’s power.

Given the Spectre’s power and the chance to kill Jean, Ralph takes her back in time to witness Sue’s death. He clears her mind of Eclipso so that she can fully see her crime. It’s a well done scene, by which I mean it’s unpleasant and difficult to read, which something like that should be. Ralph fails to kill Jean and the Spectre taunts him. But the crafty Ralph reveals something: the Spectre gave away that it is possible to bring Sue back. So, off he and the helmet head for Nanda Parbat…

…where Montoya and the Question are hanging out. She’s still doing her Kill Bill bit. He’s dying of cancer. This sucks. I like the Question, a lot. My guess: Montoya will be the new Question. This has potential, sure, but give me Charlie as written by Rick Veitch. Oh, and I find it pretty damn comical that the Question’s secret trainer, Richard Dragon, is a total Chuck Norris look-alike.

The only other scene shows Waverider in a crappy apartment full of clocks, which is one of those ridiculously overt devices this series has consistently smacked readers over the head with. I don’t know anything about Waverider, but I guess he is the “seer of hypertime.” Time Commander shows up at 5:25:50 (SEE! LOOK AT ME!) and time freezes. Time Commander, on the other hand, melts after giving vague warnings. He seems to call Rip Hunter out as a villain. Hmm. Then Skeets shows up and continues his path of destruction. I don’t want to ruin anything, but I really like Skeets as a villain. Reminds me of that crazy metal ball in Phantasm.

Overall, a good issue. Focused, intriguing, fun and sad. Can’t ask for much more for $2.50.



The Tales of Woodsman Pete

By Lilli Carrè
Published by Top Shelf, 2006. Retail price is $7.

Plot: Umm… A crazy old guy lives out in the woods and talks to animals, dead and alive.

Photobucket - Video and Image HostingStrengths: This book doesn’t fit very well into this format, mostly because it’s so freaking weird. According to Lilli (who makes a living as an artist in Chicago), she came up with this idea of an old guy living alone in the wilderness and he continually reinvents his history, to the point he doesn’t know it anymore. Along the line, Paul Bunyan comes along to share the story of how he cried so much he flooded the land and washed away the mountains of salt that people used to store things in. Whew.

What sells the slender collection is its humor. On the very first page, we see Pete awaken to a bird’s song. He remarks of its beauty to Phillipe, who happens to be a stuffed bear. Then, Pete slings Phillipe over his shoulder and trots off onto an adventure. It’s hard to describe in writing how funny this scene is, which is to say Lilli’s art carries the book to great heights – which is very two-dimensional and full of contrast. I was laughing out loud while reading, but then would hit a sudden somber point, such as when Pete reflects on his deceased wife, that’s perfectly plausible as how an old man might handle grief. It’s a ridiculous book that’s impossible not to take seriously.

Weaknesses: The only possible drawbacks to the story is that there’s nothing in the way of an ongoing plot, or at least very little of it. But with something like this, it doesn’t really need it.

Grade: A- Just go pick up this book. It’s a great read. And when Lilli is very well known a few years from now, you’ll have hipster comics cred for knowing about “her old stuff.”