The Doomino Effect for the week of June 27, 2006

Right now, I have four different cartoons due to three different editors. I have packing and preparation so I can leave town to go get married this weekend. But I don’t forget my fans. My fans come here every Tuesday expecting another Doomino Effect.

And that is what the fans shall receive.

On this eve of Independence Day, our country prepares to celebrate the sacrifices of brave men some 200-odd years ago as they stood up to tyranny. And those who wave their flags the highest with the most yellow ribbon bumper stickers will proudly label anyone a traitor who dares question our Emperor President, who has commuted the sentence of one of his cronies for being loyal. We go through the motions of celebrating the Fourth of July without thinking about what it means while 30% of us still think this administration represents anything close to the freedoms they profess so much love for.

And speaking of an unsurprising betrayal that shocks no one, that leads me to X-Men #200. I haven’t been reading this book at all, so maybe I missed out on that cleverly crafted setup that would have tricked me into being surprised, but I started reading and thinking “Jeepers creepers, X-Men, you idiots. What are you doing with someone named after Mastermind, somebody with ‘Sentinel’ in their name, and Mystique – all on your team of good guys? Was Satan too busy to put on a costume with an X on it?”

Wouldn’t you know it, by the end of the issue, the lady named after Mastermind (surprise), the lady who is a sentinel (surprise) and Mystique turn out to be BAD GUYS! Maybe the drama would have been heightened had the editors not seen fit to put this serious storyline in the hands of Chris Bachalo and Humberto Ramos, artists who might make the Smurfs look a little too cartoony and childish. The tough guys don’t look tough; the sexy women don’t look sexy; the intensity doesn’t look intense. Remember first time around, when the Marauders were frighteningly awesome? The rough expressiveness of the Marc Silvestri / Dan Green combo could not have been more perfect when conveying the confusion and desperation of the Mutant Massacre / Fall of the Mutants / Stuck in Australia days. And this art could not be further from that.

I do have some questions, if anyone would be so kind as to answer them for me. Can someone tell me why the Marauders want to kill mutants again? Mike Carey didn’t seem to think that was worth mentioning. Why on earth would Sunfire join the Marauders? How long has Gambit been a bad guy? Are Sabretooth and Cable supposed to be dead? How could Rogue get shot with a bullet? Isn’t she basically invulnerable? Thanks in advance.

And speaking of people who don’t get shot with bullets, that leads me to Daredevil #98. Melvin is still Melvin, deep down inside, even when he’s being the nasty Gladiator. Turns out someone else is pulling the strings, or pushing the buttons, or popping the pills, or whatever they’ve done to Melvin the Gladiator. This book is still good, but whereas I used to excitedly look forward to the next issue of Daredevil, I find myself now just kind of dutifully reading it. Maybe this is all going to be an awesome build up for the Michael Turner covered issue #100. We’ll see. There’s no chance I’m going to drop Daredevil, especially because I can’t even really pinpoint what it is that has caused me to lose my enthusiasm, but I do miss the days when I really enjoyed it.

Speaking of books I used to really enjoy, that leads me to Supergirl and the Legion of Super-Heroes #31, the beginning of the Quest for Cosmic Boy! I do like that there is a purpose behind this coming arc, but the writing and the art on this were really sub-par. I really liked the team of Mark Waid and Barry Kitson, and this SLOSH just doesn’t feel the same. Beyond the sloppiness of the election results, this issue just looked and felt rushed. Again, probably not a book I’ll drop anytime soon, but I do wish for more.

And speaking of wishing for more, that leads me to X-Factor #20, what I assume to be the conclusion to the X-Cell problem. A bunch of ex-mutants go to Quicksilver to get their powers back, but as has been the recurring theme with Quicksilver’s gifts, the powers go bad and people blow up or whatever. As long as he’s had the power to give people powers, nothing has worked out right for anyone, so I don’t understand why people keep going to him. If someone hears on the street that he gives powers back, aren’t they also going to hear “But oh yeah, after he gave me my powers, my skin caught on fire or my lymph nodes exploded” or whatever? Apparently not, I guess. This close-knit community can’t be bothered to communicate that detail. A town of 5000 knows when someone gets pregnant, but the tiny little ex-mutant community doesn’t seem to know that everyone who gets their powers from Quicksilver has it backfire on them.

Anyway, this issue was dumb, and that’s probably the first time I’ve said that about X-Factor. A pretty big dud of a week for me, other than Sinestro Corps #1. But if you want to read about a bunch of authoritarian elitist power-mongers intent on ruling through fear, turn on your favorite cable news network and listen to George W Bush give an Independence Day speech and drop in references to how anyone who doesn’t follow his lead on the War on Terror is emboldening the enemy. God god dammit dammit.