Most Disappointing of 2006


The real artists

“Learning about how many artists have lackeys who draw their backgrounds. It reminds me of when I learned that the guy who wrote the Backstreet Boys’ songs wrote Bon Jovi’s comeback hits. If you’re going to get credit for being the artist, do your own work. If two people do the work of one person, come up with some cool mysterious code name for your creative union. But don’t pose for your geeky fan mugshots in the Wizard Top 10 if you don’t do your own work, you little turd.”
— Jim Doom

The Goon/American Virgin

“Way back when, The Goon was one of my favorite series. Funny, silly and full of zombie-killin’ goodness, it was a highlight of whatever week it hit the shelves. Those days are gone, and I’m starting to be convinced they’ll never return. The series was even worse this year, hitting a nadir with the cosmically unfunny Dwight T. Albatross Goon Noir issues. But perhaps even worse was American Virgin, a series that could have been inventive and deep, but instead hit every dumb cliche and devolved into a sputtering mess.”
— Jean-Claude Van Doom

X3

“X-Men: The Last Stand could have been great. Then they gave it to Brett Ratner instead of Matthew Vaughn.”
— Doominator

Civil War

“Marvel had me going for a while there. Civil War was very good up until the delay, and then everything went to hell. The mini-series started making no sense, and Marvel kept churning out a ridiculous amount of crossovers that really didn’t need to exist. We’ve gotten a few really good stories out of the whole thing, but it just seems like there’s been a whole lot more bad than there’s been good.”
— Fin Fang Doom

DC’s wussy heroes

“I was horribly disappointed with Nightwing, Flash, and Ion. They should team up and form their own supergroup of crybaby understudies. You could seriously swap any one of those three idiots and you’d have the same exact series. I’m a 20-something kid trying to find his place in the world. I don’t need to read about that in comic books!”
— Doom DeLuise