Stump the Doominator, Week of March 29, 2009

Sorry I dropped the ball last week, folks. Things have been confusing in Doominator land, between work, allergies and night classes, last Sunday ended up a catch-up day – and not, unfortunately, a Doomkopf one.

So let’s start. Remember. You give me something to sum up in a sentence, to varying degrees of success and seriousness.

This week’s questions come from the ever-hungover Doom DeLuise

1. Who is Xorn? Not Magneto, either. The actual Xorn.

Xorn is some Chinese guy with a black hole in his head who decided to impersonate Magneto and infilitrate the X-Men so that he could reveal himself as Magneto only to be told by Marvel that he wasn’t Magneto at all because they’ve done their best to erase all of the awesome things Grant Morrison did for the X-Men seemingly out of spite, making sure that afterwards they became boring again, Xorn became some weird Collective thing and they introduced an identical Xorn who was the twin brother to Xorn but not evil like Xorn and he quickly disappeared because Chuck Austen created him, something Fin Fang Doom would probably defend.

2. Who was the sixth member of Infinity Watch?

You were, although you don’t remember it because they were calling you Maxam, who would be notable only for being a sixth member; the problem here is naming the other four because they’ve all but disappeared into the sands of Marvel time because one of them was named Pip the Troll and the others were kind of boring but probably still involved in the Annihilation crossover thing, including Thanos, who is arguably the other “sixth” member.

3. What was the Thor Corps, and why did they team up?

It was Beta Ray Bill, Thunderstrike and some weird Future Thor thing teaming up for some time caper that was significant only because it was another needless early-90s mini-series that led to the collapse of Marvel because they distracted from how flimsy some of the other titles were.

4. How many times has Wonder Man died and come back to life?

Too many.

5. Speaking of Wonder Man, whatever happened to Baron Zemo?

He led the Thunderbolts until Marvel turned it into Fight Club and then into some Norman Osborne vehicle even though he was running a counter-Thunderbolts and being reformedish and doing some sanctimonious things in Civil War and traveling back in time and deciding he wasn’t so Nazi after all.

Finally, I announced last week that soon, I would be rewatching old comic movies and defending them. I haven’t gotten this underway as of yet, but Doomsday Spa may have got some wires crossed and thought I would defend anything comic being adapted into a movie. He asked:

I dare you to defend the making of a movie version of Superman and Batman vs. Vampires and Werewolves! I argue this is the worst comic I’ve read in a long time. Would it be a good movie? Defend that?

It would be a TERRIBLE movie because vampires and werewolfs fighting anything is weird enough, and the closest they can get before circling the drain is Abbott and Costello because that’s patently ridiculous, moreso than the idea of Superman freeze-breathing a werewolf or Batman throwing a Batcross into Blacula; all this considered, I would probably watch it.

That’s it for this week. Send more questions along to doominator_at_doomkopf_dot_com.