New “Avengers” and “Amazing Spider-Man” Leaked Teaser Trailers

Comic Con is fast approaching, and news is already starting to leak out a bit early. One of the things that has happened in the past couple days is that the teaser trailers for both “The Amazing Spider-Man” and “The Avengers” have leaked online. The Internet Police are on top of it, though, so it’s really hard to find working links to either of them that last longer than five minutes. Luckily, I have nothing better to do, so I found them, and now I’m going to share with you a recap of both!

First, let’s start with The Amazing Spider-Man, starring Andrew Garfield and some other people.

The teaser I saw was really blurry and shaky, filmed by some guy in a theatre, so the quality was pretty poor, in other words. It starts by showing Peter Parker doing some things and talking to some people. There’s a cute blonde girl that I’m guessing is Gwen Stacy, and she says some stuff, too, but I couldn’t really understand it, since the audio is so poor. About midway through the teaser, it shows Peter get bit by a spider, and then we get the standard “now he’s a geek with muscles” shot, followed by a closeup of the back of his neck, where we can clearly see the spider bite.

The overall tone of the teaser suggests the movie is going to be a lot darker than the originals, with Peter being more sulky and depressed before getting bit. I guess they’re taking their cues from the success of “The Dark Knight.” Either way, it’s not really a tone that fits with a Spider-Man origin story, so I’m not sure if it’ll work all that well.

At the end of the trailer, we’re given about fifteen seconds or so of Spider-Man running around on a rooftop and swinging between buildings. The twist is that it’s shown from his point-of-view. It’s like a first person shooter video game, only with Spider-Man instead of some dude carrying a gun. At the very end, he’s shown swinging toward a glass building, and we finally see his reflection in the glass before he lands on the wall and poses. The end.

I think it looks kind of okay, but I’m skeptical. I mean, what’s the point of retelling Spider-Man’s origin story? We already saw that. And by “we,” I mean every single person living in America. That movie broke all kinds of box office records. Do they really need to rehash that just because this is a reboot? I think not.

Next up, let’s talk about The Avengers teaser trailer.

It’s filmed in the same style as the Spider-Man one, by some dude with a handheld camera in a crowded movie theatre. I have an idea for these movie executives: Rather than trying to shut down these leaks, which seem inevitable these days, why not just wait for them to happen and then officially release a high-quality trailer as soon as they pop up? It’d give people a much better first reaction than having to watch a low-quality shitty version for their initial impression.

Anyway, this trailer starts off with Captain America in a t-shirt hitting a punching bag in some loft apartment, it looks like. Nick Fury walks in and tells him he has a mission for him. Cap asks if it’s to get him back in the world. Fury says, “To save it.” Just as he says this, Cap punches the bag so hard that it flies off its pin and is sent across the room. What a wallop! I wish you could see it; it’s really quite cool.

From there, we’re shown lots of shots of shit blowing up, along with quick snapshots of all the major players in the movie, including Bruce Banner, Black Widow, Iron Man, Thor, and Hawkeye. We also see a shot of Loki with an armed escort of guards walking somewhere. All of these fast cuts are over the top of some words being flashed on the screen that read, “SOME. ASSEMBLY. REQUIRED.” Some of the shots are really sweet. They literally have to be seen to be believed!

At the end, it shows all of the Avengers in their little war room aboard the Helicarrier, and Nick Fury says, “Gentlemen. You’re up.” AVENGERS LOGO. Then it cuts back to Tony Stark slapping Thor on the arm and saying something that I couldn’t make out. Probably something pithy.

Anyway, it looks great. May 2012 can’t come soon enough!