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Meaningless Awards of the Week- 4/11/07

Understatement of the Week- Norman Osborn is “bipolar,” Thunderbolts #113

If by “bipolar” you mean “sometimes manipulatively evil, sometimes just batsh*# crazy,” then yes, I guess you could say that Norman Osborn is bipolar. But regardless of what you call it, it’s fun to watch.

When the creative overhaul of Thunderbolts was announced a while ago, I was really disappointed, mainly because I still really enjoyed what Fabian Nicienza was doing with the series. But Warren Ellis and Mike Deodato have quickly won me over with the story been telling so far. They’ve brought the Thunderbolts back to they’re roots: replace Baron Zemo with Norman Osborn and the story essentially the same as the first year of the Thunderbolts. Osborn is using a group of villains and would-be heroes to further his own agenda while Moonstone is secretly plotting to overthrow him and take over the team. In fact, somebody undermining the leadership of the team has been a recurring theme throughout the entire series. Warren Ellis and Marvel may have a better grasp on the concept of the Thunderbolts than I give them credit for.

Buzzkill of the Week- Tony Stark, She-Hulk #17

I can’t get behind Iron Man anymore. After Civil War, I just don’t like him. He doesn’t seem like a decent human being anymore. He did some pretty bad stuff to some pretty good people and hasn’t shown any remorse about it (at least not in any of the comics I read). He manipulated Peter Parker, he beat up Captain America, and he murdered Goliath. And he was rewarded for those things by being named director of SHIELD.

So that kind of spoiled this week’s issue of She-Hulk a little. A year ago I would have thought it was cool to see She-Hulk teaming up with Iron Man; now I just wanted him to go away. A year ago I would have thought it was funny that She-Hulk slept with Tony Stark; now I feel bad that such a great character was sleeping with such a dirtbag. A year ago I would have thought it was bad to have the SHIELD Helicarrier taken over by a villain; now I’m glad it happened on Tony’s watch.

Marvel built Tony Stark up as one of the biggest villains in the history of the Marvel Universe during Civil War. Regardless of what Marvel editorial may claim, he wasn’t presented in any sort of positive light throughout the entire thing. Now that Civil War is over, Iron Man is a hero once again. At least that’s what Marvel’s telling me, even though they haven’t given me a reason to consider him a hero again.

I’m begging you Marvel, give me a reason. Have him save the world. Have him rescue a little girl’s kitty from a tree. Have him make amends with the heroes that didn’t register. Hell, have anyone of those nonregistered heroes just say “Y’know, I guess Tony’s not such a bad guy after all.” I’ve never been a fan of Iron Man, and I probably never will be, but I’d rather feel indifferent towards someone that’s supposed to be a hero than hate him outright.

Wonder Woman Moment of the Week- Gail Simone named as new ongoing writer

Wonder Woman has been having a lot of trouble ever since she broke Max Lord’s neck two years ago. And it’s not trouble within the DC Universe.

Wonder Woman hasn’t had a good, steady writer for quite a while. Will Pfeiffer finished the previous volume of WW a few months before Infinite Crisis ended, and while it was a decent send off (particularly the fmal issue), the story seemed stretched a bit thin near the end. Fast forward One Year Later and Wonder Woman was getting pushed as a major title by DC, putting the latest “it” creator, Alan Heinberg, at the helm. Then came the massive delays, and fans started to realize that Heinberg might not be the talent everyone made him out to be. So Heinberg’s fInale gets but on hold and the much-hyped Jodi Picoult takes over the title. Unfortunately, Picoult doesn’t seem to be living up to the hype either. And considering she’ll be gone in three issues, I don’t expect anything she does will be particularly meaningful or longlasting. Pretty much the only time Wonder Woman has been written well in recent memory is during the Manhunter arc she appeared in.

But something tells me that’s all about to change when Gail Simone takes over later this year. She’s done great work on Birds of Prey and Secret Six. Simone seems to have a genuine affection for each and every character she writes, and that shows through in her work. And maybe most importantly of all, Simone
seems to be in this for the long haul, so she’ll actually be able to build plots, define characters and give depth to the title that you just can’t do if you’re only writing five issues.

Depleted Intergalactic Peacekeeping Corps of the Week- the Nova Corps, Nova #1

This was actually a really close race between the Green Lantern Corps and the Nova Corps. After all, the GLs seem to be dropping like flies. Something’s been wrong with Mogo for a long time, and now it appears as though whatever it is has “infected” Kilowog as well. Anything that can take down the biggest Lantern and the strongest Lantern without alerting anyone probably won’t need long to take down the rest of the Corps. They already got Green Man and that robot Lantern, and who knows how many others.

On the other hand, there’s only one Nova Corps member left. And he’s overworked to boot. So maybe it wasn’t really a close race after all.

Continuity-Free Romp of the Week- Spider-Man/Fantastic Four #1

There comes a time when you just get sick and tired of all the wars (be they civil or world), crises, disassemblings, countdowns, initiatives, others, annihilations, and attacks. For those times, there is Jeff Parker.

Parker has made a name for himself recently by writing stories that are essentially continuity-free. His stories don’t ignore continuity or, worse yet, contradict it, but he tells them in such a way that they don’t need to be set in any specific point in time to make sense. X-Men: First Class was one of the best miniseries in recent memory, and it was set in a non-specific time between X-Men #1 and Giant-Size X-Men #1. Parker’s Avengers: Disassembled What If? one-shot succinctly told you all the continuity you needed to know before moving on to tell a better story in one issue than Avengers: Disassembled was in four. With Agents of Atlas, he took a group of obscure characters and told a critically acclaimed story.

So there was little doubt in my mind that another continuity-free mini-series written by Parker would be anything but extraordinary. Especially when Mike Wieringo is the artist attached. And especially when it’s a Spider-Man/Fantastic Four team-up story. And especially when Spider-Man is in the classic red-and-blues.